10 Basic Boundaries To Set for Yourself

Every healthy relationship has one thing in common: boundaries. But what exactly are boundaries? They look different for every couple, but there are some universal basics when it comes to setting them.

Boundaries prevent fights from spiraling out of control and stop you or your partner from crossing lines—especially when one of you needs space to handle something alone. While each couple’s boundaries will vary, they should always strengthen the relationship as a whole, not just serve one person.

Even though personal boundaries are unique, there are still a few fundamental ones you should keep in mind if you want a healthy, lasting relationship. Here are some core boundaries to apply:

# They must be single

If someone is already in a relationship or still married, don’t waste your time. Unless they’ve clearly ended things, you’re just a temporary distraction. Don’t play therapist or emotional backup—let them deal with their own issues.

# No means no

Respect is non-negotiable. If your partner doesn’t accept “no” in any situation, they don’t value you. Excitement with the “bad boy” or “cool girl” fades fast, but disrespect lingers forever.

# They should be able to apologize

If your partner refuses to say sorry or take responsibility, that’s a red flag. A healthy relationship requires accountability, not endless blame-shifting. Without apologies, resentment will slowly drain you.

# Don’t parent your partner

Supporting your partner is different from raising them. Everyone has baggage, but it’s their job to work through it. You deserve an equal partner, not someone who depends on you for everything.

# Kindness matters

Watch how they treat their parents or others close to them. If they’re rude, cruel, or dismissive, chances are they’ll treat you the same way. Respect starts at home.

# Don’t chase

If someone isn’t reciprocating your efforts, stop running after them. Love should feel mutual, not like you’re begging for attention. Don’t waste energy proving your worth to someone who doesn’t see it.

# No lies

Honesty is the foundation of trust. Lies—whether small or big—poison relationships. You shouldn’t feel like a detective piecing together clues. Love is not a treasure hunt.

# No name-calling

Insults and degrading comments have no place in a relationship. If your partner crosses that line and refuses to stop, it shows a lack of basic respect.

# Respect sexual boundaries

Your sex life should be about mutual comfort and consent. You’re not obligated to try anything that makes you uneasy. Clear communication ensures no one feels pressured or blindsided.

# Trust is essential

Without trust, there’s no foundation. If their behavior constantly raises suspicion, listen to your instincts. Don’t stay just to prove they can’t be trusted. A partner who betrays you isn’t invested in you the way you deserve.