10 Do's and Don't in a Relationship Argument

Arguments are a natural part of most relationships. Sure, some couples rarely fight and seem to understand each other completely, but for most of us, small disagreements and misunderstandings are bound to happen.

Getting into a fight doesn’t make you a bad partner, nor does it mean your relationship is flawed. What truly matters is how you handle the conflict. The way you end an argument can strengthen or weaken your bond.

While you can’t always prevent arguments, you can control how you respond to them.

Couples often fight over things like money, insecurities, or family issues. Usually, it starts with something small—a difference of opinion—but if ignored, these small issues can grow into resentment. That’s why it’s important not to bottle up your feelings or hide significant concerns from your partner.

Arguments in themselves aren’t necessarily harmful. What causes lasting damage is the way you express anger—hurtful words, accusations, or disrespect. Remember, once words are spoken, you can’t take them back.

So before lashing out, ask yourself: Are you arguing to solve the problem, or just to hurt your partner?

Not all fights are negative—they can be a way of saying, I need to be heard. But never forget: your partner is not your enemy.

Here are some key don’ts to keep in mind during relationship arguments:

# Don’t stay silent

Ignoring your partner when they ask for answers only builds walls. Silence may feel like avoidance, but it makes them feel unimportant and hurt.

# Don’t raise your hand

Physical aggression is never acceptable. It signals weakness, not strength, and turns love toxic. Conflicts can be resolved without violence.

# Don’t hit below the belt

Avoid cruel, irrelevant insults like attacking their job, personality, or friendships. These wounds cut deeper than the argument itself and leave scars.

# Don’t threaten to leave

Saying “I’m leaving” or threatening a breakup in the heat of the moment is destructive. Serious issues should be discussed calmly, not thrown out as weapons.

# Don’t use profanity

Swearing or verbal abuse only escalates anger and causes lasting hurt. If you want a healthy discussion, avoid foul language.

# Don’t be dismissive

Statements like “So what are you going to do about it?” show arrogance and disregard for your partner’s feelings. Passive-aggression won’t solve anything either.

# Don’t generalize

Phrases like “you never” or “you always” exaggerate mistakes and put your partner on the defensive. Focus on the issue, not character assassinations.

# Don’t confess to hurt them

Using an argument as a stage for shocking confessions only makes things worse. Arguments should aim to fix problems, not score points.

# Don’t deny your anger

If you’re upset, admit it. Saying “I’m fine” when you’re clearly not only delays resolution. Acknowledging anger is the first step to addressing it.

# Don’t bring up old baggage

Dragging past mistakes into current arguments only blocks progress. Stick to the present issue instead of reopening old wounds.