4 Ways To Resolve Conflicts With Your Child’s Teacher

Teachers and parents play an equally important role in developing a child. Naturally, both the parties have immense influence on the behaviour and learnings of a child. One of the most important things parents can do for their children is to maintain a good relationship with the teacher, and all good relationships take work and wisdom. Even if you can’t see eye to eye, you can definitely keep things civil and positive.

* Nurture the relationship from the beginning
There’s only so much you can learn about a kid from a file, so starting the year off with some basic facts is helpful. Keep it light, and be sure to communicate that you appreciate and support what the teacher is doing. Yes, teachers get a lot of emails, and no, this sort of email will not be a bother.Checking in periodically – maybe once a month – even if you don’t have a reason to be concerned can really help foster a good relationship. You are sending the message that you care.

* Communicate

If you’re unfortunately already at the point of conflict, I’d urge you to take the time to get the teacher’s perspective.Communicate with the teacher to seek their side of the story with specific questions. Doing it preferably via an email is better since it gives time to you and to the teacher to take in the conversation. The questioning email tells the teacher what the parent has heard, and asks for his or her side of the story. This email allows the teacher the tactfully fill in the gaps, and it also makes it easier for him or her to acknowledge and correct a mistake. Because teachers do make mistakes, and most want to make them right.In these situations, keep in mind that there’s zero motivation to go into teaching besides a passion for the job. There is absolutely no way to make a fortune, so you are dealing with people who care enough about kids and their futures. You might not agree with every teacher’s methodology, but you can generally assume that he or she wants the same thing you do: your child’s success.
* Choose your battles, and wait to respond
Remember, this is a relationship you need to nurture; don’t damage it with a fury of emotions. Give yourself a few hours to calm down so that you can send a civil email and get the full story. And choose wisely when you decide to involve yourself in a situation. You don’t want to be the parent that gets eye rolls and sighs from the staff because you are beating down someone’s door every day. There are definitely times where your child will need you to be an advocate; you’ll be taken seriously if you save your thunder for those relatively rare scenarios.

* Take The Opportunity

Finally, take the opportunity to model for your children how to handle conflict. Not every teacher is amazing for every kid, and what a valuable lesson to learn to do your best in less-than-stellar circumstances. Think about your child’s future: most people have a boss they don’t like at some point. They might even have to tough it out in a job they hate until they can find something better. Teach your kids those skills now. It is unlikely that a teacher will change the way he or she computes grades, gives notes, or talks about politics, but you can teach your child how to adapt their attitudes and work habits.