6 Ways To Break Away From Controlling Relationship

A controlling person can wreak havoc in your life. While your decision-making powers are taken away and your self-esteem becomes non-existent you are left with no choice but to seek freedom. In a relationship with a controlling person, you could be trying for a long time to change things to make your partner see your point of view.

But if you feel that you are not making a breakthrough, breaking away could be the only way to find your sanity again. But how to get out of a controlling relationship? If you think your partner is extremely controlling, here are 8 ways to break away from such a relationship.

# Assess your own position

While in a controlling relationship, there are often instances wherein you feel very low or there is a lack of self-confidence because the other person constantly tries to belittle you.A person who is controlling has to reinstate his/her power position in order to be able to control you.

What you can do is to emphasise on your importance in their life. Give them a taste of their own medicine. Don’t belittle them, just tell them that you hold a position in their life which nobody can replace. Let them depend on you.

This can make them feel less powerful and closer to you. When they realize that, they might start giving you the space you need and gradually, lessen the control aspect of your relationship. The trick is to win them with love.

# Draw the line

At times, it is important that you tell them what is okay and what isn’t okay. Healthy relationship boundaries can help both of you to improve your relationship. You have to show them a limit of your tolerance.

Generally, in a relationship when one person controls another, in the beginning, it is seen as insecurity, then possession, then love and until you realize that its pure control, it’s already too late.

When you draw a line, make sure you stay firm about it. If you have to spend your life with this person, don’t allow them in the zone of your vulnerability. If you think you don’t want to involve them in your finances, state that firmly. If they create issues about going out with your friends, then make it clear that you would want to do that because it makes you happy.

# Start ignoring their orders, start accepting their requests

A common trait of a controlling person is giving instructions. Their presumption is that they are more knowledgeable as compared to anybody in the room which gives them the right to make decisions for everyone. Having a controlling and manipulative spouse makes your day-to-day life a hell.

No matter how calmly you request them to let you do your thing, they won’t understand. In that case, to get out of a controlling relationship, you need to start avoiding them.

# Talk to them and about them to a mature adult

Leaving a controlling relationship is not easy but keeping on suffering in such a relationship is also stressful. While it’s true that a relationship should be between two people, if your spouse has a controlling nature and you are suffering, it is okay to talk to someone older and more mature.

First, start by talking to your partner, addressing the issues you are facing because of their behaviour and how it affects your love life and relationship. If that doesn’t work, talk to their parents or your parents if they are free-minded.

# Start dropping hints that you are dissatisfied with the relationship

In a case where your partner doesn’t agree to the controlling part, you will have to start giving indirect hints expressing your dissatisfaction. You might have to express your disagreement or pick a fight when you cannot do your thing or not listen to them.

All these things will make them understand that you are dragging the relationship and are not quite happy with it.

# Do not get buried under their anger

Unfortunately, a common trait in all controlling manipulative relationships is the showing of temper. They do not show it to intentionally scare someone, but in their subconscious, they know that anger is a very powerful weapon.

They can have things their way if they get angry or start shouting and screaming. Living with a controlling person can be extremely challenging for this very reason. Their anger issues can make every sensible conversation turn into ugly fights.