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- 6 Ways To Stop Liking Someone You Cannot Have
6 Ways To Stop Liking Someone You Cannot Have
By: Kratika Fri, 27 Jan 2023 3:16:50
Do you find yourself thinking about someone you can’t be with all the time? It’s not necessary to completely and immediately let go of someone, but you can do it eventually. Make room for yourself in your head and heart – this could be the time for you to rediscover and retain your individuality as you move forward.
How to stop liking your crush when they’re committed to someone? How to stop liking someone and just be friends instead? These questions started to perplex us at high school and manage to follow us into our adulthoods as well. Most of the time, we learn something new about ourselves in the process of moving on, and the other times we end up repeating the cycle of falling for the same kind of people.
# No more living rent-free in your head
We’re all guilty of this at some point. The nature versus nurture theory suggests that we’re attracted to people who are off-limits because of an innate survival trait that tells us they’re of a high value.
Fantasizing about your crush when you can’t be with them is tantalizing. Sexual and romantic attraction are the culprits behind the rosy scenarios that play in your head before you go to bed. That’s until you’re snapped back to reality during the day.
# Acceptance is key
You’re probably thinking to yourself, “Not this advice again”. If the internet, your best friend, and your mom, all of them are handing out the same advice, it’s because it works. Getting over your crush does not have to be a herculean task, it can be gentle and simple. One that does not leave any emotional baggage or resentment behind.
You could go out every weekend and get wasted in clubs for months and still not make progress. However, just one evening where you sit with yourself, away from external noise, can be enough to start accepting and grieving the fact that you can’t have your crush.
# Stalking is self-sabotaging
*Sighs* This is just as bad as stalking an ex on a regular basis. At least when it comes to your ex, you’ll stop stalking them because you know you don’t wish to get back together with them. But in the case of a crush, you have hope – as little as it may be.
The temptation to constantly check their Instagram stories is real, but it’s also painful and detrimental to your health. Ask yourself, do you really want to see their stories of going out on dates with their partner?
# Use humor as a coping tool
This may sound odd to some but it is true that humor goes a long way in uplifting your spirits and overall well-being. A research published in 2021 revealed the role of perspective-changing skills using humor to deal with psychological burdens.
Humor creates a buffer between you and the sadness that unrequited love brings into a person’s life. We have been using humor as a way to cope for centuries; you know what they say about laughter being the best medicine.
# How to stop liking someone you see everyday? By journaling the sad and ugly
Do you wish things were different and your crush wasn’t taken? Then write about it in your journal. Do you wish you didn’t have to find out how to stop liking someone you see everyday? Write it in your journal.
Treat your journal like a safe space where you can speak your mind in the tone that you want without having to worry about offending anyone. You can brood over your emotions, express your love for your crush, and talk about their shortcomings too (trust me, it helps).
# Keep reminding yourself that this is temporary
When we go through any emotional upheaval in our lives, we tend to lose sight of the big picture. It is important to remind yourself every now and then that it’s not always going to be this way. You will find the love you’re looking for. At Bonobology, we believe in a happy and imperfect love.
Your feelings may not be reciprocated this one time from this one individual, but that is no reason to get pessimistic about your love life. There truly are plenty of fish in the sea. Focus on eventually starting to see other people. If you’ve been in love with your best friend for a while, then it’s going to be difficult compared to a fleeting crush. But it’s still temporary.