7 Most Common Signs Of Codependent Behavior In A Relationship

Codependent behavior is a complex psychological concept that has been extensively discussed in numerous books. It can manifest in various types of relationships, such as romantic, platonic, and familial, although some individuals exhibit these tendencies solely in romantic partnerships.

What may initially appear as caring and devoted behavior often conceals codependency disguised as love. Many TV romances are based on the notion of codependent behavior, which can be perceived as intensely romantic rather than problematic.

This highlights the significance of recognizing the indicators of codependent behavior. It is crucial because there is a high probability that you might be in a codependent relationship without even realizing it. Once you become adept at identifying codependent traits, you will likely observe them frequently in TV shows, movies, and everyday life.

It is important to remember that excessive dependence on anyone, whether a friend or a romantic partner, is never healthy. It causes you to lose sight of your own identity and become entwined solely with someone else.

In some cases, your partner may enable your codependent behavior because they enjoy being needed and having you rely on them. This subtly establishes a dynamic of control and power, leaving you feeling helpless and vulnerable when lacking your partner's support.

# You let their mood change your mood

In the presence of this individual, you absorb their negative energy when they've had a rough day. Their bad mood tends to dictate the course of your own day, and your focus becomes centered on their emotional state.

Do you find yourself tiptoeing around them, afraid of aggravating them further? Are you constantly striving to uplift their mood?

Have you ever questioned the reason behind this pattern? Although you may not identify as an empath, it is possible that you exhibit codependent tendencies. The fact that your emotional well-being is heavily influenced by theirs indicates a significant presence of codependent behavior.

# You take responsibility for their feelings and even actions

This pattern is quite prevalent. When your partner makes a mistake, you assume responsibility for it. You assert that if you hadn't done A, they wouldn't have done B. Furthermore, if they're having a difficult day, you feel accountable for improving their mood.

Moreover, when they commit an error, you automatically attribute it to your own inadequacy. You consistently shoulder the blame, even when it is unwarranted.

# You place their struggles on yourself

A typical codependent relationship resembles the dynamic between an addict and a sober individual. The sober person assumes the role of "fixing" the addiction but inadvertently becomes an enabler for their partner.

Regardless of whether the partner indulges in drinking or substance abuse, the codependent person takes care of them and fulfills their desires in an attempt to alleviate the situation. However, this ultimately reinforces and perpetuates the harmful behavior.

Consequently, the sober person's own identity becomes intertwined with their partner's sobriety. They derive a sense of self from their ability to fix, transform, or rescue their partner. If there are aspects of their partner that are broken or flawed, the codependent individual consciously makes efforts to inspire their improvement.

# You crave their approval

Engaging in typical codependent behavior involves yearning for their approval and validation, to the extent that you feel uneasy without it. It goes beyond simply being someone who values words of affirmation; you have become codependent on them.

When they fail to express pride in something you've accomplished, your enthusiasm and passion for it diminish. You refrain from cutting your hair if they disapprove. Your self-worth is entirely dependent on their perception of you.

If they say no, you relinquish pursuing something you initially desired. In other words, their approval dictates your decision-making process.

# You cover up for them

This aspect of codependency can present significant challenges, placing you in difficult situations that affect both minor and major aspects of life. For instance, if your partner drives under the influence and damages your neighbor's mailbox, you willingly accept the blame or fabricate a lie to protect your partner's safety.

Essentially, you consistently prioritize their needs and well-being above your own.

It is crucial to recognize the stark contrast between prioritizing someone and shouldering the consequences on their behalf. You readily fulfill their every need, even before they ask, often at the expense of your own life and well-being.

# You feel unworthy of something more

Internally, you recognize your unhappiness, and you might even feel trapped within the confines of this relationship or friendship. It becomes particularly challenging when it involves family, as you convince yourself that this is simply how things are, and there is no way to escape.

But why do you experience these emotions? It is because you are caught in an ongoing cycle of seeking validation from them and basing your entire life around their presence.

You excessively rely on them to boost your self-esteem. Deep within, you have lost a sense of your own identity to such an extent that you no longer believe you deserve anything better than this. You have convinced yourself that you are undeserving of prioritizing your own well-being and pursuing your own happiness.

# You “need” them

You may perceive being told that you are needed as a romantic notion. However, it should never entail sacrificing the autonomy to shape your own life and make choices based solely around another person. Engaging in such behavior indicates codependency.

You believe that you won't be able to survive or thrive without them. They are an absolute necessity in your life. Even if they bring you misery, the thought of being separated from them causes intense anxiety.

You feel as though you cannot function or exist independently without them, and they are the sole source of purpose in your life.