10 Signs That You Are In A Coindependent Relationship With A Needy Partner
By: Kratika Tue, 02 Aug 2022 9:43 PM
Codependent relationships are not exclusive to people who are seeing each other. It can also happen between family members, friends, roommates or even coworkers. With romantic relationships however, it’s easy to mistake love, affection and neediness with some of the telltale signs of codependence.
There are two people in a codependent relationship. One gives and gives and gives, while the other keeps on taking without any thought to the emotional strain it’s giving the relationship. It’s termed codependent because both people contribute to the unhealthy situation.
The dependent partner relies on an enabler to satisfy their needs emotionally and physically at a level that’s unreasonable. The dependent one can then take up all of their partner’s time and energy in the process. The enabler, on the other hand, allows the dependent person to continue his or her behavior because they believe that this is the only way to keep their partner from breaking down.
# Your partner can’t socialize without you
A dependent partner will assume that they cannot function in public without their lover. They feel safer, more confident and more at ease only when they have their partner in tow.
# Your partner becomes paranoid whenever they can’t reach you
The worst fear of a dependent partner is losing their enabler. They concoct various scenarios like infidelity, abandonment or even death as the reason you can’t help them out.
# Your partner won’t acknowledge their achievements if you don’t know about it
Whether it’s a promotion, a scientific breakthrough or any positive milestone, none of these matter without your acknowledgement. It’s only when you’ve cheered them on that they can truly be happy about what they’ve achieved.
# Nothing they do makes them happy unless it’s with you
They could very well be meeting the President or going to the moon, but they would be very unhappy unless their partner was with them. Barring extreme examples like those two, they cannot develop their own personal hobbies that satisfy them unless their partner does it too.
# When you say jump, they leap
Anything you say is the word of law to your dependent partner. They say yes to anything you say, even if this goes against what they used to believe in before they met you. They’ll do anything you ask because they feel that disappointing you will make you abandon them.
# Your partner doesn’t have an extensive set of friends
The dependent party may have had friends before, but in their quest to gain approval in their enabler’s eyes, they choose to immerse themselves in their enabler’s circle of friends instead.
# You can’t stand not being there when your partner needs you
Whether it’s a burglar or an unopened pickle jar, the enabler in a relationship will always try to save the day. If they fail to do this, they will consider themselves a failure and take it out on their dependent partner for asking them for anything in the first place.
# You have this incessant need to change your partner
You want to change your partner for the better. However, you may be giving off mixed signals since you might alternate between pushing them to be their better selves and allowing them to still count on you for everything.
# You find yourself sacrificing your passions to cater to your partner’s needs
It’s almost never an emergency when your partner calls for you, but there’s that sense of urgency that you simply can’t resist. No matter how trivial the situation is, you allow yourself to shut out the world just so you can help your partner.
# Your partner relies on you to make decisions, no matter how trivial
Whether it’s buying something new, accepting a job offer or even wearing a certain outfit, your partner must always look to you for advice. They may be torn between getting what they want and getting your approval, but they will always rely on you to tip the scales in favor of whatever makes you happy.